So, I wasn't able to get done the last couple of weeks what I wanted to get done.
I was asked to make some decorations for the Homecoming Dance this weekend, and every free moment of my life the past two weeks has been consumed by that. But, it has kind of been a good thing, even though I am tired of looking at paper logs and leaves.
Having a firm deadline and an enormous task to complete has made me realize just how much I miss getting to do my own work. All through art school, I worked furiously to meet deadlines. Hell, the day before my thesis show, I still had roughly 100 portraits to finish and mount. Even though it was incredibly stressful, it was extremely gratifying and made me feel like I was accomplishing something with my life.
I miss it. I have been so stressed lately, but this one thing has kept me going. I've found myself thinking lately about what it would take to quit my job and just work on my art full time, even if I can't make a living by doing it. It is so very tempting.
I think to help me out a little bit, I am going to force myself to work, even if just for an hour to get things done. I think it will help ease some of my stress and help me not feel like an utter failure.